Have you ever feel that you are not good enough?

23:36 Unknown 1 Comments

Assalamualaikum!

First of all , I want to wish all of you Selamat hari raya Aidilfitri. Maaf kalau ada tersalah taip ,cara penulisan atau tersentap dengan post aku. Thanks siapa yang sudi baca blog aku sembunyi-sembunyi. (since follower aku cuma 4 orang) hahaha. 

Ok, have you ever feel that you are not good enough and you keep comparing yourself to other people that you feel that look prettier than you, attractive than you or maybe happier and confident than you. Ya, aku pernah berada dalam situasi tu. Most of the time, especially bila dulu aku tengah down and really frustrated with what happening to me. Everyday, I keep questioning 'did I deserve this and that?' , 'Am I a bad person?' , 'boring person?' , 'Am I annoying?' 

It's hard when your level of confidence are low. Seriously, benda ni bukan terjadi cuma dengan with your relationship with your partner, tapi in your friendship and work too.  Aku pernah tertanya-tanya , why my boyfriend cheat on me? why he left? what if I went to an interview and I'm the worst candidate? What if , my friend get annoyed listening to my stuff? What if I'm not attractive to him anymore? Kusut. 

At the end, bila benda tu sudah nak terjadi, tetap akan terjadi.Of course, even how much you hurt and pretending that you are heartless and don't give a damn but deep down in your heart still put some little hopes to someone or to something. So, in reality kau bermain tarik tali. kadang-kadang kau macam nak & kadang-kadang tak nak. Sebab kau tengah protect your heart from being hurt again and again .Who doesn't feel sad if you failed on your exam? who doesn't feel sad if you failed on your interview? Who doesn't feel frustrated if you give hope to someone at the end , they broke your heart and leave? 

Sometimes, when we keep getting hurt by not getting what we want. kau dah tak berani beri harapan tinggi untuk sesuatu lagi.Kau sedaya upaya untuk buat tak kisah dan tak terlalu fikir and trying so hard to follow the flow. orang mungkin akan nampak macam "eh,dia ni nak atau tak nak? macam tak bersemangat , macam tak kisah kalau tak dapat" .fuh, I get that comment on my interview previously. They said I was like not really want that job.  I really want that job, but I know there's a plenty candidate there are way more good than me. Maybe I have some heartless face too. haha. 

When you're in relationship too , you are facing the same problem too , even worst you keep questioning yourself if you are good enough to your partner until it lead you become a needy and too clingy person. Especially when you saw your partner, liking or commenting someone picture and you feel like they were good looking than you. Then you was like , " what if he/she falling in love with her/him? what if he/she will leave me for the person?" Seriously I hate that feeling. huh. It's not a  big deal actually, cuma kau yang fikir over sangat. Comment & like jer pownn. tu pun jadi isu. kan? Kau yang tak confident dengan diri kau sebenarnya.

So, the conclusion is Pray. Aku pernah tiba-tiba feeling down and sad ,just because tiba-tiba insecurities aku meningkat and I feel like I'm not good at all sampai kau tak tahu nak meluah dengan siapa, sebab kau tahu it's just kau punya perasaan, you don't even know if it's gonna happen or not. But your mind is full of negativity with all the questions of "what if.." , so pray. It's okay to cry, god always have time to hear all your stories and problem . Benda tu buat kau tenang, dan buat kau ingat kembali , kau ada Tuhan yang sentiasa sayang kau. Kau patut rasa bersyukur kau masih ada rasa yang kau belum cukup baik, sebab oleh perasaan tu kau akan sentiasa cuba untuk jadi yang lebih baik, dan ajar kau untuk humble and keep strong.:)